Archive for September, 2016
Today, Briefly, Trying to Be Good
Posted by Carl in Finding Purpose, Poems on September 16, 2016
Forcing myself into the death chair,
thinking, now I’ve got it, now I will do
what it is I lie to myself about being
mandatory, feeling so disciplined when
really, I’m alarmed at how close to
nothingness I have become, and that
dark crevice where inspiration lies
is filled with contempt for being,
and the doctor might try, but the
required self hatred fills the hole.
Love Will Save You, I Heard, But It Won’t Save Me
The sound that rakes
my spirit plows my flimsy,
rotten body into mountains,
my crinkly spirit sailing undetected, above,
deluding my desires, spying the molten
bodies fixed beneath me, still inspiring the
mangled part that strives to sink into
a starless eternity, without fear, leaving me
wondering why I’m still breathing and why
music from concrete geniuses ices my
soul in orange heat that won’t
annihilate me, no matter the will, and my body
moving poorly, rotten man that I am, nothing
improving, self hatred fatiguing,
but still breathing, struggling to remember
that this was all a tortured gift.