Archive for September, 2016

Today, Briefly, Trying to Be Good

Forcing myself into the death chair,
thinking, now I’ve got it, now I will do

what it is I lie to myself about being
mandatory, feeling so disciplined when

really, I’m alarmed at how close to
nothingness I have become, and that

dark crevice where inspiration lies
is filled with contempt for being,

and the doctor might try, but the
required self hatred fills the hole.

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Love Will Save You, I Heard, But It Won’t Save Me

The sound that rakes
my spirit plows my flimsy,
rotten body into mountains,

my crinkly spirit sailing undetected, above,
deluding my desires, spying the molten
bodies fixed beneath me, still inspiring the

mangled part that strives to sink into
a starless eternity, without fear, leaving me
wondering why I’m still breathing and why

music from concrete geniuses ices my
soul in orange heat that won’t
annihilate me, no matter the will, and my body

moving poorly, rotten man that I am, nothing
improving, self hatred fatiguing,
but still breathing, struggling to remember

that this was all a tortured gift.

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