Where Did My Friends Go?

I hide from my friends.
They circle like airplanes
in the fog of Pearl Harbor
battles and the radar

is fucked, so they’re
sharks, and I’m in
the tower, but they’ve
tossed me in the basement,

or I’ve tossed myself,
and I’m cargo like
destroyed Buddhas
rolling off runways

into dense thickets
of barbed wire from
camps where when
we’ve lost our purpose

we’re carted off to die,
and I feel my face,
screaming at the fear,
as I’m chewed up by a

G.E. engine, splatting
and splashing droplets
falling near my scattered


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  1. #1 by Hudson Howl on December 29, 2012 - 12:13 pm

    I have found, at a much too late point in life that – lose yourself, lose your friends. Unless their a true friend, they will stick you. Won’t they?

    • #2 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 8:57 pm

      Thank you for your comment. They should.

  2. #3 by Hawkruh on December 29, 2012 - 12:25 pm

    Fear of abandonment by friends is definitely something I can relate too. Perhaps because I’ve had so few true friends. They’ve been hard for me to make. Your poem captured a true feeling for me. And is sad. (((HUGS)))

    • #4 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 8:59 pm

      Thank you for your comment. They are tough to make. They are special in that way.

  3. #5 by Carl D'Agostino on December 29, 2012 - 9:37 pm

    So many close friends not part of my life now and were truly valued. I don’t understand how they just evaporated.

    • #6 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 9:04 pm

      Thank you for your comment. I’m glad you’re puzzled also.

  4. #7 by Elisa on December 30, 2012 - 9:04 am

    Thinking about the number of ways I can view those around me, and the number of ways this has changed, even when I have stamped my foot and INSISTED that I could do…and hold onto this or that and be ok. Ha!

    There are very few persons anymore, where beyond an attempt to respect them, that I bother to care or to even notice what they think or wish of me. I tell people that I walk alongside of them as long as I wish or they wish. Sometimes things merge, sometimes they do not. I find that to create healthy situations for me, and maybe for those around me to.

    • #8 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 9:08 pm

      Thank you, Elisa. I appreciate your thoughtful comment. You have good insight.

  5. #9 by senzasordina on December 31, 2012 - 10:53 am

    Hope you’re doing well. Have a great new year πŸ™‚

    • #10 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 9:09 pm

      Thank you for your comment. It’s nice of you to visit, and I hope your 2013 is full of good things.

  6. #11 by stillight on January 1, 2013 - 10:41 am

    wow, Carl… i love the harsh feeling and reality of this piece… even identify with it at times… where i sequester my own self off from friends and feel like yes, i’m in my own makeshift bomb shelter. great work! submit this somewhere for sure, and also, happy new year to you!! may 2013 be kind to us all.

    • #12 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 9:10 pm

      Jennifer, your comment means the world. I appreciate your comment.

  7. #13 by Val on January 3, 2013 - 11:34 am

    Some people stick like glue and you never know why, others that you think will stick with you forever, just wander off never to be seen again.

    I hope this poem isn’t a statement of how you’re still feeling. If it is – a remote hug for you.

  8. #14 by Val on January 3, 2013 - 11:34 am

    And I wish you a happy new year or, if ‘happy’ doesn’t seem attainable, then ‘happier’.

    • #15 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 9:12 pm

      Val, thank you for your visit and your kind comments. I hope your 2013 is bountiful.

  9. #16 by abichica on January 5, 2013 - 9:18 am

    So many of us experience this at some point in our lives… But it is beautifully written.. A happy new year to you dear friend.. πŸ™‚

    • #17 by Carl on January 8, 2013 - 9:13 pm

      Thank you for your comment. I appreciate it.

  10. #18 by settleandchase on January 28, 2013 - 12:28 pm

    I know this place…wishing you light..

    • #19 by Carl on January 28, 2013 - 9:58 pm

      Thank you for reading and thank you for commenting. I appreciate it. The light comes to visit when the mind is open.

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